I just came back from lunch with one of my girls who knows that I write this ridiculousness. We were talking about end of the month costume ideas, and she jokingly suggested that I dress up like Coke Talk for Halloween — red satin jacket, grey sweats, trucker hat, big sunglasses, and a half full baby bottle.
Oh, the irony.
It’s a shame I couldn’t get away with it really, because it’s a hilarious fucking costume idea.
That’s why you should go as Coke Talk.
Yep. I’m serious. If you’re a fan of my shit and still haven’t found a costume that’s both comfortable and a conversation starter, look no further than the picture of Britney on my blog.
Maybe it’s a little douchey of me to assume that anybody would want to dress up like Coke Talk for Halloween, but fuck it. I’m not selling anything, and I think this’ll be righteous fun.
If you do decide to coke it up this Halloween, email me plenty of pictures of you in your costume. I’ll be sure to hook you up with some kind of cool, personalized type thank you situation.
Can’t wait to see how this goes.
When formspring hit tumblr back in 2009, I started giving party tips on my personal blog completely on a whim. Within a couple months, the tips had turned into advice and the process had turned into its own little side project, and so a year ago today, I started Dear Coke Talk.
Not that I need to tell any of you, but it’s been a fucked up spin around the sun. I watched my career do a slow motion crumble and then put it back together with scotch tape and spit. I’ve helped my family through a divorce. I’ve helped one of my best friends through prison. I’ve been on a crazy thrill-ride love roller coaster that still has my stomach queasy. I’ve been kissed and bruised by every kind of high and low the city of angels can spend twelve months throwing at a girl, and the one thing that always kept me smiling in the time I carved out for myself was that silly fucking advice column.
I’ve answered 626 questions this year. That’s almost two a day, so for those who write in to tell me I don’t post enough, fuck you. I answer your questions more often than I masturbate.
That’s not an empty comparison, by the way. I really do enjoy answering your questions. Shit feels good. I had no idea it was gonna be my thing, but firing off a few choice lines has more than a few similarities to peeling off a quick orgasm.
Dear Coke Talk has become the steady backbeat to all this wild and ridiculous shit I otherwise call a life, and I love every one of you motherfuckers for reading it, and for the many thousands of you who’ve taken the time to write, I love you even more.
Thank you all so much.
You could learn a lot about my clit by staring into this picture.
Yeah. When you find a good rainbow connection, they never tell you this is how you’ll look the next morning.